It’s mostly considered perfectly acceptable for little girls to believe in fairies and to enjoy magical stories and movies.
In general, unless you follow a Pagan path, believing in fairies when you’re older is considered crazy, to say the least.
Updated 2/9/2020 – When I was a child, I loved fantasy and the idea of fairies, reading and watching anything I could about their world.
A major event in my childhood happened when I was eight years old, during a visit to my Grandma’s in the country.
She’d moved to a remote property after Grandpa died, becoming totally self-sufficient and living mostly off the grid.
I was thrilled to go and spend time with my beloved Grandma, as she often spoiled me and also believed in fairies.
For the first few days, the two of us baked cookies, drew pictures, read stories and spent a lot of time in her garden.
There was a dense grove of trees at the back of her property which had always been wonderfully mysterious to me.
The problem was, Grandma forbade me from exploring it, as she warned that it was not safe for children.
I was drawn to the magical, mysterious forest
Realizing that there was no point in pressing my Grandma for permission to go, I decided to sneak off by myself.
Grandma had one of her migraines one afternoon, so when she went to have a lie down, I saw my chance to go.
Once I heard her snoring, I crept out of the house and snuck down to the forest, feeling the magic beckoning to me.
There was a definite border in front of the forest, which gave me a tingling feeling as I approached with little steps.
Moving over the invisible threshold, I felt like I’d crossed over into a kingdom filled with wonderful experiences.
Then I froze when I saw a figure in the golden mist, about thirty feet ahead of me on the path through the forest.
It was like a bald, alien-like creature with no clothing – asexual or at least – wearing a head to toe body suit
I could faintly see a pleasant face smiling at me, while it was bathed in golden light and emanating the gold mist.
My childish mind interpreted the being as some kind of fairy and I was excited when it began to wave me over.
As I began to approach it, I saw other fairy-like creatures in the bushes – smiling and encouraging me to keep going.
I was transfixed by the idea of entering a mystical world and felt drawn to the strange creature waving to me.
Suddenly I felt a hand grab my arm and drag me backwards.
When I turned around I saw my Grandma’s angry face.
She raced me back to her garden and smacked my bottom, telling me that I was very naughty and had to go to bed.
I cried my eyes out, not only due to the fact that I was now in trouble, but because I’d missed a great opportunity.
Looking out of the guest bedroom window on the second floor, I could see the creature watching me from the woods
For the rest of my visit, Grandma kept a watchful eye on me, so I never had a chance to try and return to the forest.
After I arrived home, I continued to beg my parents over the years to let me go back to visit Grandma, to no avail.
My father told me that Grandma was growing senile and they were worried about her sanity, so they stayed away.
When I was thirteen, we heard the dreadful news that Grandma had passed away, leaving the property to my Mom.
For some reason, she wouldn’t sell it but also wouldn’t rent it out or use it for any purpose, other than to maintain it.
I always wanted to go back to see the strange creature
It wasn’t until I was fifteen, when Mom let me accompany her to the property to help with the garden.
I realized that Grandma had never told my parents about the episode when I was eight years old, to my delight.
When Mom started cleaning inside the house, I raced over to the edge of the forest with a secret thrill in my heart.
I sensed the same magical feeling at the edge of the forest, eagerly stepping over the threshold to run up the path.
It wasn’t long before I saw the golden mist and the mysterious being beckoning to me with the familiar smile.
Now that I was older, I was also bolder as I strode along the path, noticing the magical creatures in the bushes.
As I approached the creature, I noticed that it was indeed an asexual being, and I was amazed to see what appeared to be delicate wings.
The wings were small and lacey like a dragonfly’s, reflecting the golden light with a kaleidoscope of rainbow colors.
I stopped a few feet in front of the being, who was around four feet tall and was shocked to hear it whispering.
My shock was due to the fact that it seemed to be speaking telepathically to me as it continued to smile
I began to feel dizzy and delirious with spiritual pleasure, while the golden mist seemed to be penetrating my soul.
The words I could make out were along the lines of: “Welcome little spirit.
I didn’t exactly know what that meant, but as I fell to the ground in a gentle faint, warning signs jolted my mind.
Lying in the long, blonde grass, I heard my Grandma’s terrified voice calling to me.
“Don’t go with them!”
My consciousness was reduced to a pinprick as I saw a very different type of being standing over me.
The golden mist had been replaced by a dark, stormy whirlpool of clouds and black smoke, which soon dissipated.
A crimson colored demon looked down at me with torn, leathery wings buffeting about in the storm clouds
The evil laughter burned my ears as the landscape morphed into a hellish realm of pain and fire.
As many malevolent creatures swirled above me and snatched at my hands and feet, my Grandma appeared.
Two red demons had my wrists while two yellow demons had my ankles – pulling in opposite directions.
My Grandma was bathed in pure, white light that was tinged with blue.
She zoomed down from above in a flash.
I don’t remember how, but she fought the demons off and flew up in the air with me in her arms – crying.
All of a sudden I found myself in the garden, lying down among the Foxgloves and Snapdragons, still crying.
When I sat up I saw a white light whisk up into the air, like a bird. Somehow I knew that it was my Grandma.
I stood up and looked towards the forest.
I could still see the golden mist and the creature on the path, waving to me.
My Mom came out of the back door to call me for lunch, unaware of my terrifying experience in the forest.
I understand how anyone would think that my experience was either a psychotic episode or my imagination.
In fact, sometimes I too, think I might actually be insane.
Since that experience I often see weird things in my peripheral vision and hear whispers in my bedroom at night.
These days it’s hard for me to tell what’s real and what isn’t.
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